Weight loss tracker

Thursday, June 30, 2011

Cool Sculpting Experience

Ok, so I spent a good part of Tuesday afternoon having my fat frozen. Yes I had my cool sculpting appointment. It was very strange but I think I dig it. We’ll have to wait and see the results first. Let me explain. The procedure is being done at my surgeons office by the nutritionist and receptionist there. What it is supposed to do, is freeze fat cells in a particular area, causing them to die. Then over a period of 2-4 months your body will naturally flush out the dead cells, leaving you with few fat cells in that part of your body. This is not intended for weight loss! This is intended for those areas with stubborn fat that diet and exercise don’t seem to touch. Now Momzilla did this with me and they were very honest with her during her consultation and suggested that if she wanted to see real results she might want to go the plastic surgery route. But she says she is a big chicken so want wanted a nonsurgical option to make her clothes fit a little better. They say you can lose 10-20% of the fat cells in the area you have the procedure on. But it isn’t going to make you drop a lot of weight. My mom and I share the curse of saddle bags, no matter how thin we are or how little we weigh. So we thought this might help. I will also caution you that it is expensive and not covered by insurance. Since I am getting married in a year (OMG I’m still not used to that, I’m getting married!) Momzilla offered to pay for it for me.

So I arrived at the office for my appointment. They only have one machine and Momzilla was still on it, so I went back and sat with her for her last few minutes. It was really weird to watch them remove the machine. Now I am wishing I had taken some pictures but I didn’t think of it at the time. After they massaged Momzilla’s cold spot it was my turn. I pulled on some short shorts and hopped up on the table.

First they marks on my upper, outer thigh to show the where the ends of the machine should touch and where the center should be. I don’t know how to describe the machine. It is hand held with programing buttons and has a hollow portion in it. They put this cool gel cloth over that spot and smooth it out. It is very cold! Then they put the machine up to the marks and hit a button that started the suction. Now they say that this is painless. It is not! They say it feels kinda like a mammogram but I’ve never had one so I don’t know. On a pain scale I would say it was a 7 or an 8. Really, nothing us VSG patients can’t handle. It’s enough to make you go OWWW! Then it stays for a couple of minutes. After that the pain is gone. They prop the machine up on a pillow and help you get into a comfortable position. Then I just sat there and watched TV for an hour while the machine worked it’s magic.

I was amazed by how much this thing managed to suck up into it. I mean I could actually see through the clear portions to see the marks they had made. It is a really weird feeling. The suction is what makes this work so you have to becareful not to break the suction. Meanwhile you just sit there while it cools down the fat that it sucked up. I don’t know how they do that without hurting your skin but it is fine. After the first few minutes of pain and discomfort you don’t’ feel anything. The area is numb. So you don’t really feel how cold it is either.

After your hour the machine massages the area for a couple of minutes. Then the operator releases it and pulls the machine off of your “Stick of Butter” as they call it. It’s an area that was sucked into the machine that is now red and raised and kinda looks like a stick of butter. The operator massages this area for a few minutes and it goes down and back to normal on your leg. You can still see a red area but that’s it. It’s crazy if you touch it with your hand afterwards. That spot is so cold! I have no idea why you don’t feel it. The area does hurt a little when they take off the machine and massage it. It just feels like a bad bruise. The whole thing can cause some bruising too. I have a few bruises. Momzilla has a few more because she bruises more easily. Next the whole thing gets done to the other leg. I would say that I spent about two and a half hours at the doctor’s office. Afterwards I put regular clothes on and went to the grocery store. Just like nothing happened.

The next day I felt a little bruised but not bad. Now I just have to wait and see how my body expels the dead cells. I can’t wait! I really hope it works! I’ll admit that while I had my one side hurting after having the machine removed and they went to do the other leg I was a little nervous. I definitely held my breath when they put the machine on. But at the same time, I kinda want to do it again! I think this has the potential to be addictive like piercings and tattoos. If it works that is. I was thinking about it the next day and wanted to experience it again. It’s a really weird sensation to have your fat sucked up in that machine. I can do it again to a different area. Or if I want to do my outer thighs again, I can in two months. Momzilla is planning to go do her inner thighs next week. I am contemplating my knee fat. I have icky bags of fat on the sides of my knees and I hate them. But I will wait to see if this works before I pay more money for it.

Cross your fingers for me! If anyone has any questions about Cool Sculpting, Feel free to e-mail me!

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Cool Sculpting and some news

Hello Readers!

So I must inform you of a new development. I’m engaged!

Yep, Coach finally popped the question and made it official. We will be getting married next June.

Now that that’s out, on to more sleeve related discussion. I’m still stalled, which is frustrating. But I am very excited. My surgeon’s office sent me a brochure about a new procedure they do called Cool Sculpting. It’s very interesting. I went to an informational on it last night. It was so cool. Basically they use this machine that sucks in the fat and then freezes it. It chills that area so that the fat cells freeze and die. Then over the next few months, your body gradually expels the dead cells. It’s supposed to help with those areas of stubborn fat that just won’t go away, despite diet and exercise. It is also a non-surgical alternative to liposuction. They say that the area will lose 10-20% of the fat over a two to four month time period. I watched a woman who was having her inner thighs done get the machine taken off one leg and moved to the other. It doesn’t hurt, It may be a little uncomfortable for the first few minutes and then there is nothing. After they remove the machine the skin is a little red and that’s it. Each treatment takes an hour and one treatment is all you need. But you can do more if you want to increase the results. It’s a little expensive and insurance doesn’t cover it. But I think it will be worth it. The dietitian at the office preforms the procedure.

I’m getting it done next week. And Mommy dearest (hereby to be known as Momzilla because she is driving me crazy with wedding planning) is paying for it. I am going to have my outer thighs done. My thighs are where I collect all my fat. It’s always been that way. The dietitian seemed really positive about the results I can expect. She was pretty honest. She recommended that Momzilla look into cosmetic Surgery but Momzilla really doesn’t want that. She is a big chicken and doesn’t want surgery. So she is going to have the procedure too. But I’m not sure how well it will work for her. I’m really excited about getting it done next week. It will take two hours, one hour per leg. If it works like it is supposed to, I may do my inner thighs and/or my arms. I think my inner thighs are going to need cosmetic Surgery. I have a lot of extra skin on my inner thighs and some flabby fat. So I will probably need the skin removed and a little lypo. But I am going to wait until I hit my goal weight. And then I will consult with the plastic surgeon. I am really hoping this works get rid of those terrible saddle bags that have plagued me my entire life. I’ll let you guys know how it goes. For those of you that want more info, here is a link that explains it.


Friday, May 20, 2011



So I am officially past the one year mark from my surgery. I’m down 88lbs but not at my goal yet. I have two goals actually. One is my realistic goal and one is my crazy goal. I have twelve more pounds to get to my realistic goal. I’m a little disappointed that I haven’t hit my goal yet. I was sure I would by now. My doctor’s happy because I have continued to lose. But I have had some big stalls. Three weeks, then only a one pound drop, then three weeks again. I know that I have gotten into some bad habits though. I don’t always remember to track my calories, I’m not getting enough protein, or water. And I’ve been missing the gym because I’m so busy. So I am rededicating myself to my weight loss. That also includes remembering to blog.

So here is my plan to lose those last twelve pounds. I am going to record my food every day, no more than 800 calories. I am going to add my half a protein water back into my diet (it adds 20 grams of protein to my day). I am going to buy a huge bottled water every morning and make sure I drink the entire thing each day. I am going to cut back on my wine consumption. I love wine but it is wasted calories. I am going to add my exercise more often. If I can’t go to the gym I will do some kind of exercise outside now that the weather is nice. I go back to my doctor in four months. I will be at my goal by then!

I am starting to have issues with extra skin. I wore shorts when I went on vacation in April and was horrified by the pictures. I couldn’t believe how bad my legs look! I have saggy skin there and pouches of icky fat that feel like bean bags when you touch them. Not good! I asked my doctor and he said it was time to consult with a plastic surgeon. The only problem is that insurance will only cover tummy tucks after this much weight loss. I told him that I chafe sometimes and get pinched. He said I should go to my regular doctor and have her document it. Then maybe they can write to the insurance company and a ask them to cover the surgery. I feel kinda silly going to my doctor though. I mean she is busy. And if I go in there she isn’t going to be able to do anything to help me. So it seems silly. I’m going to wait until I am closer to my goal and then go see her. I know she won’t mind me taking up her time with this. And she probably would write to the insurance company for me. She is really happy about my progress. But it still seems silly to go and complain about something she can’t fix. I am starting to save up the money for the surgery. I saw the bill from my brother’s tummy tuck and so I have an idea of what to save up. But it’s going to take a while. I am hoping that if I am really good at the saving I’ll have the money shortly after I hit my goal.

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Non-Sleeve Related Musings

Good Afternoon!

Until now I have been hesitant to use this blog as a forum for my general thoughts and feelings not related to my sleeve. I have shared this blog with my boyfriend, my cousin Red, and my best friend Sweets. So I figured that just in case one of them read something I posted and misinterpreted it, or if I wanted to write about one of them I would keep this strictly sleeve related. But as far as I know, they have pretty much stopped checking out this blog as I have adjusted to my sleeve. So maybe it would be ok to use this site to vent some of my general thoughts and feelings. I’m not talking about bitching here. I’m talking about musings that I have in passing that I may never think to discuss out loud, or that maybe are too abstract to discuss. I don’t know. Just my thoughts I guess. I won’t even charge you readers a penny for them. And if any of you would like to give feedback I’d be more then happy get to get it. So here we go, Sorry, it’s gonna be a non sleeve related post.

Is there such a thing as being too forgiving or too accepting? I mean where do you draw the line between that and being a doormat. What if someone isn’t exactly wiping their metaphorical feet on you, but they are still a little off? If it doesn’t bother you in the big picture how much of a stink do you make about it? My experience is with Coach, my boyfriend. The big man has hissy fits occasionally. I mean fits like a twelve year old girl with screaming and door slamming and everything. Now I will say that this is a very rare occurrence. They are also never directed at me. I would not stand for that. These boots would be walking my ass right out of there if that was the case.

Usually when this comes up I forcefully tell him to knock it off and he settles a bit and starts talking more calmly and rationally and eventually calms down. But last night it was not happening. He wasn’t even listening to me. He starting have his fit outside and I could hear him in the house. He was yelling about our broken back door and started screaming and slamming it over and over. He was actually stomping his feet! I tried to get his attention but nothing worked. So I decided that I was not going to indulge that behavior by trying to calm him down or discussing it. I just ignored him. He even threw some stuff. I did not speak to him until he was rational and calm. He just railed at the door for a bit and finally came inside and told me what he planned to fix it. I told him that was fine and offered ways I could help the situation. Then I told him he needed to control his temper and he started making jokes.

When these outbursts happen he always gets very upset with himself afterwards. He apologized to me, which I pretty much ignored since he wasn’t yelling at me. But sometimes he does do this to his parents or in front of his parents and afterwards he always get ups upset and calls himself a bastard and apologizes. I always tell him that he needs to learn to control himself because this is what always happens. That he ends up ashamed of himself. Again I would like to say that these are a rare occurrence. Like once every one or two months. But still they seem very childish and immature to me. They aren’t productive and are just a little ridiculous for an adult man.

So here is my concern, should I be more bothered by this? I mean when he does it, it pisses me off and I tell him so. But other then that I don’t really think about it or care. I mean is this a big deal or just the type of thing that is a stupid annoyance. Am I being too forgiving by letting it go after “I’m sorry”? I don’t like the behavior and I try to discourage it when it happens. But since it doesn’t happen every time he gets mad and he never directs it at me, is being forgiving and accepting a bad thing? Is it ok for me to say that this is just something he needs to grow out of and encourage him to cultivate the tools to do that? I don’t know. I don’t think it’s bad. But I know other people would not feel the same way. Some people would maybe even think it’s a deal breaker. So what do I do with this? Am I wrong here?

If you have made it this far I would like to thank you for reading my musings.

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Who is that Chick in the Mirror?

Who is that Chick in the mirror?

I’ve found myself asking that more and more lately. It’s kinda funny to look in the mirror and not recognize yourself right away. I guess it means that due to my weight loss my mental image hasn’t caught up to the image that gets reflected back to me.

I first experienced this a few weeks ago. My cousin had her first communion and her mom (Red) took pictures of her with everyone at the party. Then she sent them to us with a thank you card. When I got the card, I didn’t recognize myself in the picture. I actually spent a few seconds wondering who that was with my cousin. It was a little shocking to realize that it was me. My face just didn’t look the same. It wasn’t what I expected. Next I started experiencing this at work. I would walk past a mirror or something reflective and I would think, “who is that professional looking woman?” and then I would realize it was me. I would see myself and think that “that woman has long legs” and then realize those were my legs. I don’t have long legs. Infact I have short and chunky legs, that’s where all my weight goes. But now, I can wear clothes that give me an illusion of having long legs. I never could do that before. I keep having these experiences where it takes a moment before I recognize myself. It’s a very weird feeling. I wonder how long it will take before my mental image catches up to my physical image? It makes me wonder what will happen when I reach my goal. Because even now, 80 lbs later, I still feel like the fat girl. I still feel fat running right to my thighs when I indulge in something. I still feel huge defeat if I haven’t lost any weight, or (Heaven forbid!) I gain a pound (which is probably water anyway). I’ll post some pictures later to demonstrate what I expect to see in the mirror and what I actually see. Thanks for reading!

December 2009

January 2011

Thursday, February 10, 2011


Good Morning Readers!

I hope you are all doing well. So apparently my new work responsibilities are making me drop my blogging time to once a month. Bummer. I’ll work on it. So I have been to my doctor and he was so happy with my weight loss he told me I could stop if I wanted. I said hell no! I’m goin’ for the gold, another 20-30 lbs. He was happy to hear it. He did warn me that once I had the 100lb gone mark things will get tougher. I’ll worry about that when I come to it. I also went to see the GI specialist. He said that my high copper may just be a variation on normal. My body might just work that way. The numbers are only a little high, not crazy high. So he ordered more blood tests and if they all come back normal then my body just has more copper then most. Good to know.

So my scale has suddenly decided that it wants to drop numbers every time I step on it. Usually I go a few days with no change and then do a two or three pound drop. Lately, every time I step on I’m down at least half a pound. That’s awesome and encouraging. Even though this morning my jeans felt a little tight which is frustrating since I have dropped in weight since the last time I wore them. So they shouldn’t be tighter. I never did get to do that pouch test. I have had some meals that I had to eat with other people who I didn’t want to explain it to so I haven’t been able to find five consecutive days that I could do the test. I’m a little less worried though. I’ve had snacks in the afternoon which is unusual but I’m still losing and in fact, when I count my calories I am still under my 800 so I’m good. I have also found that I am eating less and less at dinner. My food choices in a day tend to be the same most days. This is what I eat

Breakfast: ½ a bagel with cream cheese or ¾ an instant low sugar oatmeal

Mid Morning: 1 cup of coffee

Lunch: Some kind of soup, 4-6 oz depending on the type

Snack: (lately my protein water has not been appealing so I haven’t had it) Sometimes I have chips and two table spoons of guacamole or a small pop

Dinner: ½ a chicken breast at most, a few bites of salad and a small amount of green veggie (usually asparagus since it’s my fave)

It really doesn’t end up being much calorie wise. So I’m usually good. I have had a few weird experiences lately. First, the other night I made baked chicken for dinner with some yummy cheesy potatoes. Now potatoes are supposed to be an easy food for us to eat. I don’t know what happened but my tiny tummy rebelled against this meal. I had maybe two tablespoons of potatoes and ¼ of a chicken breast and I had that choking throat feeling where it feels like your food is backed up into your throat. I thought maybe I ate too fast and went to lie down. A few minutes later I was doing a sprint to the toilet to get rid of the little bit in my belly. The Tiny Tummy said “No Admittance” What was up with that???

Another weird experience: Yesterday I was feeling good in the morning. I had my usual breakfast and was fine. I decided to go to lunch early because I had a full afternoon and as I was walking to the deli to get my soup I suddenly started to get woozy. I felt disorientated and hot. I started shaking and feeling sick. By the time I got my soup I had to sit down before I fell down. It was like my blood sugar did a sudden sky dive and dropped like a stone. I felt horrible. I could barely hold my spoon to eat I was shaking so badly. I ate all of my soup, which was 8 oz. Then I got a pop and slowly sipped it. I sat at a table, dying to put my head in my lap, until I felt like I could walk back to my desk. I felt a little better and the shaking went away but it was still weird and not right. I sipped on the pop until around 3 o’clock when I decided to try eating again. Maybe more food would help. I went to the Mexican place and got a beef quesadilla (I can only eat ¼ of one) and some chips and guac. I ate the quesadilla and felt much better. I took my chips upstairs to munch on and shortly was feeling normal again. It was very strange. I usually can’t eat that much. And I don’t know what caused it. It was weird and a little scary.

I have been hitting the gym three days a week but I haven’t been pushing as hard as I should. I know I need to do a little more. At this point I have a little bit of a muffin top that I know will get better with more working out. I’m not so sure about my legs. They have always been chunky and where most of my weight likes to reside. They are starting to look kinda gross. I can tell I have a good amount of extra skin on them. My doctor had thought that extra skin there wouldn’t be a problem but it is not bouncing back like she had thought. I am starting to worry about it. Has this happened to anyone else? Let me know. In the mean time, love to you all and I will post again soon!

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

I'm Baaack!!!

Long time no Blog Everyone! I’m so sorry it’s been a while since I wrote. Things have been very crazy for me. My boyfriend Coach, bought a house and closed on Dec 17th. We moved in together and spent our first night in our new house on January 1st. So I spent two weeks cleaning and moving and getting the house ready. Coach also got a new job which kept him from being able to help me with all the moving stuff. We also had some misfortune when Coach lost his uncle just before new years. So you can see that things have been crazy busy. But now it’s starting to slow down a bit. We have been in the house for two weeks now and we are starting to get adjusted to the new routine. I am really enjoying living with Coach. Also my sleeve is really helping out in the cooking department. I cook dinner for us and I only need to make two chicken breasts because I can only eat half of one and Coach can eat one and a half. So it’s perfect. No leftovers to worry about. It’s actually been great. He is very health conscious so he keeps me cooking good healthy food. I do have a problem at the grocery store though. My eyes are always bigger than my stomach so I end up buying a lot of stuff and then I never eat any of it. LOL. But I guess it would be worse if I did eat it. I have been drinking a little too much though. I love wine so I am always wanting to have some at night. Which is not good. I don’t need the sugar. It’s not like I want to get drunk, I just enjoy wine. So I am going to have to up myself control where that is concerned. I have continued to loose weight, even though it has slowed down a lot. But I’ve been happy to see the numbers on the scale dropping. In fact, Yesterday I decided to try on a pair of size 12 jeans because my 14’s were feeling a little big. I pulled them on and couldn’t believe it. I went running down the hall in nothing but my jeans and yelled to Coach “look at these pants!” he looked at them and said “They’re big” I squealed “I know! They’re 12s!!!!” and then did a half naked happy dance back down the hall to the bedroom. I was so excited! I realized that they are wide leg jeans but still, they are 12s. I’m going to have to try on some of my other twelve’s this week and see how many of them fit. So exciting. I used to be a size 10, sometimes 8 depending on the pants so I am almost to my goal size. I still have about thirty pounds to lose though so I may even get to my dream size of a six! I would be in heaven!

I have decided to do the five day pouch test to check out my sleeve and just help give my weight loss a little boost since I see my doctor again on Saturday. Today is the first day of the test and I already miss food. I just have the urge to eat. It’s weird, I guess it’s just mental, knowing that you can’t eat makes you want to. But I’m not hungry so far. Today I also go see the GI specialist my doctor recommended. Just to remind you, Two of my blood tests came back with high copper readings which is not normal for someone who has had the surgery. It’s not a good thing, excess copper can cause a lot of problems. So my doctor is sending me to a GI specialist to try to figure out the cause and see if I need some kind of treatment.

Well that pretty much brings you up to date. I swear I will remember to blog more often and I apologize for the long pause in my posts. Thanks for reading!